POEM TIME! (After this brief introduction. )

I feel that today is one of those rare moments where I actually write out more than what I usually would. The Literature lesson notedly highlighted how concealing emotions in works actually do reveal more than the other option of actually penning down your thoughts. I feel like I am digging up filthy dirt and pasting it on the television but that is life indeed sometimes, and we do learn and move on with great lessons attained. (: Hiding becomes fruitless after a certain period of time.

I usually compose entries that are serious in nature because I used to abhor the idea of declaring one's private life on this cold and unfeeling screen. Also, I did not enjoy the impacts of posting one's true emotions online. You would feel as though you were a fish out of water, scraped and scaled, scrubbed with sandpaper. Then COUNTLESS TIMES I write all my poems and then I start adding happy things to make a resolution because I cannot tolerate unhappiness and flaws in my life being broadcast. That is okay though. I have endeavored to stop the defensive mechanism of making everything "rainbows and butterflies". Hahaha. I feel strangely odd though.

"When I was that age"

When I was seven,
the girls in my class shrieked when the teacher told them they would marry boys.
I laughed to myself.
Silly girls, is that not the duty of females?
Who wants to be an expired fruit?

Duties, duties, duties.

When I was fourteen,
I liked an older guy and he liked me.
the girls in my circle shrieked that he never liked me and they cruelly brainwashed me.
Still, looking back, it was an interesting experience, and I learnt never to like just one person so much again.

When I was fifteen,
the girls in my school shrieked in delight at the thought of getting boyfriends and first kisses.
I laughed to myself.
If only they knew what each of us did with them behind closed doors.
Well, we all learn and grow up years later.

Mere duties, duties, duties.
All for the mere experience,
but still part of growing up.

When I was sixteen,
the girls in my life shrieked that relationships were for marriage.
I did not laugh.
If only they knew what I knew.

Duties, duties, duties.

When I was seventeen,
the people in my life shrieked that meaningless relationships were the trend.
I laughed to myself.
If only I had listened to them.
Then I did.

Duties, duties, duties.

When I was eighteen,
I told myself that I had control.

"I just will never give"

We were there together again.
Different place, Different time
Yet all the same, the same motive.
Like I did not know what you wanted.

Time seems to pass so slowly with you yet
it flies by when I am not with you.
No, get out of it. You are not getting controlled.

When we were there,
Things progressed just like the rain cycle,
continuous, soothing, refreshing, life-giving.

When we were not there,
the fishes leaped and bounced
gasping for air, repeatedly, fruitlessly.

And that was when I consulted my mind.
Is this what I really want?
I know I just will not give when there is nothing to get.

When we were there,
Things progressed just like the rain cycle,
continous, soothing, refreshing, life-giving.

I just will never give when there is nothing to get.
This way no one gets hurt.
You have to be firm in your stand.