i just went for a short run near my home and i got bored of it so i headed home. cooked soup for my family! it's really delicious, so much so that i want to eat/ drink it up all by myself. i could actually package it all up and sell it. (: i took pictures of it for evidence but i can't find the cable to connect it to the computer. watched 'iron man' with them yesterday, it was awesome! the main lead has nice eyes, surprising long lower lashes that paired well with innocent large peepers, cute for a really grown man. we were fascinated with that fact! go catch it if you wish to have a nice laugh, rated pg, suitable for every age, nice red armour, cool tech, etc.

this is general-

the thing about life is you've got to pick up the pieces, no matter what is left behind- scrapes of nothing or a promising future that you anticipate. what a life, what a life of unexpected events that simply blow your mind into interlinked broken pieces? contradicts itself, doesn't it.

it is as though everything were a full circle, but you just can't connect it together and you can't piece the puzzle. once you are able to piece it and fix it as a whole to produce the final picture, you've almost apprehended the true meaning to what this really is.

the thing is, there are many missing pieces that you seek to find so hard, but you'll never find it, even till the end. it is when someone hands you the missing piece that you are able to see it with your own eyes and before that happens, all you can do is put in the substitute pieces by yourself and attempt to see the true picture, though through countless failed attempts you never seem to have it in your hands.

to get the missing piece, you've got to win the person over, and many times, we just let it be and lose everyone we love so dearly or actually think we love so dearly. there are these substitute pieces, meaning other extras in your life whom you use to TRY to replace the ones you care about and it doesn't work out= failed attempt.

does this not sound unfamiliar? are you deceiving yourself? ASK YOURSELF. what have been TRYING to do all this while? you're RUNNING AWAY but you CAN'T HIDE. you can't hide from yourself. EVERYONE has this problem. it is just how you choose to face it? substitutes pieces so do not work out. they are but just nothing and worthless in everyone's eyes. do you want to be a substitute pieces? a fake/ pirated, whatever?

i want something authentic. everyone wants the best. even then, you might not be able to attain it because it might be out of reach after all this time. how badly do you want the missing piece? how far are you willing to go for THAT missing piece of your life? are you willing to forsake all and pursue it?

we say we try, but how hard do we actually try? what is try? it means you will NOT succeed. trying is not anything. you DO IT. even when you've attained your missing puzzle piece, if you do not hold on tight enough and shower it with love, eventually, you will lose it to someone else but you can TRY to get it back but you may not succeed.

life is selfish, and so am i. everyone wants the piece you want. when you've almost got the piece safely and securely in your hands, you take it for granted, you do not treasure it but when you've lost it, you want it back so badly. you dare not fully stretch out your hand to get the piece and take it because you are afraid the person will not give it to you and give it to someone else and turn you down straight in the face and you can't find your pride anymore. you are afraid to face up to reality- good or bad. true, or true?

i want to, but yes I'm afraid, just like you. everyone is afraid, that is why they can't get their missing piece. will the kind soul give me the missing piece of my life? am i a missing piece just like everyone else or am i just a lost piece that is needed no more? maybe I'm just saying out too much but too little because this may be hard to comprehend. maybe I've lost it, or maybe i still have it but i just can't feel that i have it anymore. maybe I've really lost it. maybe you should tell me if it is still there or simple forget it if nothing is there because the truth hurts when you are on the losing end. do you know what i want to say?

damn.

( I've paragraphed it for my DEAR friend who said it was a whole chunk. (: I'm sweet and thoughtful for my dear readers. )