I am not a fan of misunderstandings.
Such prejudice should stop.
It will be over soon.


Trust Him.
He will see me through.

We're all like flowers,
stunning till it withers and rots.

Hello.

Oh yes, by the way, if you actually hear about the "glue" incident. You have to know that my books were stolen, table was scribbled on with insults, money stolen, shoe thrown into pool. ETC ETC at thirteen. Stop claiming I am insane. K thanks. Lol. That's why the venting kz.
Gee, people. Stop being so childish.

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You're right.
Perhaps I really do display myself as some mindless person that does not give a hoot about anything.
Perhaps you're wrong.
There is a possibility of viewing things in an altered perspective.

Do we really want this.
Do you actually feel things are worthwhile when we get worked up for these "vanity of vanities"?
Do they actually bother processing their thoughts before they speak?
Do they really know those concerned parties?
Do you really present your thoughts?
What do you think that reason is?
WHO do you suppose the veritable reason is?
WHO. Darn it. Lol.

The situation was almost identical, except the circumstances have changed and the location was different.
And it will never be a replica.
Like how we age and venture deeper into the woods of in this case, life?

What did you think then.
I suppose flower's still on your mind.

No surprise. She's just like you.
Shallow and superficial, concerning yourselves with frivolous things I dislike.
But I have dismissed that dislike, and I forgot.
I abhor everything like that.
The dream one doesn't exist anymore.
Everytime I look back, I see what happened.
But we've all grown up. We're not like thirteen anymore.

I haven't had dinner.
I can't wait for the end of A's.

Oh, the birds and the flowers and the trees. Haha. :/

I remember the time I was thirteen, and then I had this crush on this older guy and he dated someone else. Such sweet memories.
I was pretty unattractive then. No surprise. Lol.
And then, there was the fourteen year old stage.
I like memories from my not-in-school fourteen year old life.
Even though I was obnoxious and repulsive, I guess I was still kinda uncorrupted then.
It was really sweet.
Great memories. Haha.
Wish there were results though.
Like, as you advance into adulthood or even as you near independence, you begin to reflect on the past events of your life.
It was really wonderful.
Well, learnt a lot.

If you wanna count this year as seventeen, the lessons learnt list won't be filled yet.
I have yet to learn.
I have to.
Stop being like clingwrap.

Can I be thought of as a person of greater importance.
Halfway done through I & R.
Wish it were six and I could like finish it.
Chinese A's next Mon.

"And love, isn't love, till you give it away"
Love the song.

As much as I will miss you, bye! Gotta do work now.

Remember the "bread" story?
I like looking at it to jolt myself.
It makes me remember every darn detail.
Sweet!
You must be hungering for it.
What a nice thought and great image.
How humorous.
How laughable.

Goodnight, and your dreams will probably be bitter like you.
I can't wait to overtake you.

Tomorrow's run and schedule.

"Destroy"

Displaced emotions like a broken water bomb that
Leaks onto the furniture and destroys the finish which
was so well plastered on for months without being
altered and I
tear it off and snip it into bite size items.
Destroy.

I wish I had the time and the capacity to do things I like.
I need the freedom to do so.
I want to be unrestricted and able to have a say in my decisions.
I lead a double life.

I do not know what nor who it's about.

I should be calm and look at the splendid grass.
Accept it!

Wow, I can't wait for the holidays.
Actually, it would be much better if I had more freedom and did not have to account for anything or get reprimanded for simple things like going out.
Hmm.
School kinda gives me more allowance.

The promotional exam results were released on Wednesday and thankfully, I have fulfilled the criteria. I really thank my Heavenly Father for it.
I know that it is by his strength because I could have started earlier to have been more prepared, but I did not and started much later. I underwent drastic amounts of pressure and my working environment was not conducive at all with my younger sis attempting to feed me rubber food and screaming at me every moment. Haha, but it was manageable I guess. And I really need a new table. My table is a foldable one people use for picnics. Hence, it is truly by his grace. I must work smart from now on.

Hope my friends are okay.
I care for them a lot and I couldn't do much except offer hugs and words of encouragement.
Really wish them all the best.

Chinese A's are approaching and the year is advancing to an end.
Oral Presentation is also due soon.

Have rejected and omitted all thoughts of the painful happenings for quite a few months.
It resurfaced on Sat night.
Actually, I have to thank you a lot for everything.
No, I was always single if the reader were wondering. Haha.
I hardly write details about my life without engaging some sort of flowery devices to conceal it.
Now, I shan't.

Still, I can recall how much I cried that night at my friend's place, and then we were talking and I miss my friend that has gone abroad.
I need to forgive what you did and not do because of her which you think I probably did not know.
I need to forgive what you did to show everyone you were totally not part of it.
I need to forgive how selfish, heartless and inconsiderate you were.
I need to forgive how I was merely a tool to evoke jealousy.

And I need to forgive and learn.
I should not be angry anymore.

Just wonder if there was actually anything REAL.
Real equals" not made up for certain motives.
Haha.

But it was a pretty painful sight very recently.
Wish I did not have to encounter it.
This encounter has awakened me.

Forgive and Learn.
Haha, "then again, I am heartless" [Quoted from Vaishnavi].
LOL! :D

Every trial has a lesson for me.
I am thankful for acquiring memorable lessons from every experience.
And put NO substantive emotion into anything.
Learnt that.
Put amounts that you can withdraw.
Manipulate your mind to be positive.

Oh yes.
Time to do something meaningful with my life.

I missed my bus because I was reading the new lit text.
Finished the last pages.
On the way home, I typed into my phone.
I deleted it all.
A phone makes a nice diary.
I thought of countless things that I could blog about when I reached home but at this current moment, nothing seems to be left after passing through the mind's filter.
Haha.
I am home now and the sheer delight of relaxation does not interest me.
My gold ribbon hairband broke when I was rummaging through my bag on Saturday.
Haha, shall ttyl.